The Kids In The Hall: Episode Guide

Kids in the Hall Group picture reclining
compiled by Ed Johnson-Ott (with thanks to Broadway Video, Comedy Central and the KITH FAQ)

B=Bruce McCulloch
D=Dave Foley
K=Kevin McDonald
M=Mark McKinney
S=Scott Thompson
P=Paul Bellini
X=Extras (this could be Brian Hartt, The It's a Fact girl, or others we only know by face and not name)

[Pilot][First Season][Second Season][Third Season][Fourth Season][Fifth Season]

Pilot Episode:

Millionaires In The Garbage (B)
Workers ogle, women (B, D, K)
First Headcrusher (M)
Fran & Gordon: Brian's Bombshell (S, B, D)
Cabbage Head at his date's door (B, M)
Visit from a hysterical friend (D, B)
Headcrusher: Hysterical guy (M, D)
Hitting On Mom's Friend (D, S, B, K)
Dave Foley: Truth Detector (D)
Headcrusher goes after old lady (M, S), duels with another Headcrusher (M, K)
At the door after a date: Do you love me? (D, K)
Buddy Cole: Love at first sight (S)
Naked for Jesus (B)
Remembering Reg (all)
Headcrusher (M, D, K, B)

First Season:

#101: But I was just calling you! (M, S)
Eradicator plays Squash (all)
The Ballerina (D, K)
Headcrusher: What are you doing? (M, S)
Cause of cancer (D, B)
The Pear Dream (all)
Mississippi Gary and Kathy (M, B)
Headcrusher: Why did I crush that kid's head? (M)

#102: 30 Helens Agree: Love hurts (X)
How to write comedy/Man's chest colonized by Spain (all)
30 Helens Agree: Honesty is the best policy (X)
Cabbage Head on a dinner date (B, K, S)
Salute to the tractor (M)
Sarcastic-voiced man at party (K, D)
Buddy Cole: They Say... (S)
30 Helens Agree: You can't pay too much for a good pair of shoes (X)
Poker game: I just wish I could have a period (all)

#103: Not much call for a gunfighter these days (D)
Gorilla Sketch (K, D. S)
Businessman taunted on street (all)
Citizen Kane (K, D)
Poem in alley (M)
Businessman taunted at home (all)
Fran & Gordon: Salty Ham (S, B)
Businessman taunted at funeral (all)

#104: Deja vu fight (S, M)
My friend Apollo: What movie should we see (K, S, M)
The Daves I Know (B, D)
Good attitude towards menstruation (D)
Inside/outside the house (K, M)
When Timmy gets transferred (S, B)
Sick of the Swiss (S, M)
Slow Country Doc (S, K, B, D)

#105: I've lost my drum! (M, K)
Lawyers negotiate a date (B, M)
Headcrusher: Nightclub crowd (M)
Grandpa's finally had a little poo (all)
Vacation on Scott's body (S)
Are extraterrestrials dull? (D, S, K, M)
If Elvis was my landlord (all)
Headcrusher: Post-nightclub crowd(M, X)

#106: 30 Helens Agree: Tattoos aren't for everyone (X)
Lethargic burglary (S, D, K)
Running Faggot (all)
29 Helens Agree: Promptness is important (X)
Office firings/relaxing at the gym (D, K)
Trucking executive reflects on his beginnings (M)
Corey brings home Mr. Stevenson, a stray businessman (all)

#107: Hotel La Rut/Wondering About Tony (all)
Skydiving (all)
Wondering About Tony #2 (all)
Bobby: Angry Youth Writes Poem! (B, D, M)
Comparison Of Fletcher Christians (D)
Wondering...#3 (K, S, B)
Nina From JoyMakers: Surprise Party (all)

#108: Ping Pong Advice (M)
Fran and Gordon: Leaving For Vacation (B, S, D)
Ping Pong Advice #2 (M)
Chain Gang Reunion (D, M, K) Nobody Likes Us Guys Try For A Loan (D, K, S)
Buddy Cole: Dinosaurs At The Gay Bars (S)
Ping Pong Advice #3 (M)
Interracial Couple Visiting Her Folks (D, S, M, K)
Nobody Likes Us Guys Fight While Hanging (D, K)

#109: I Want To Die In The House I Was Born In (D)
AT&Love: Monday Morning Cathys (S, B, M)
Conferring With Doctor In Front Of Death House (D, S)
The Preacher Character (M)
Westin Esterhazy: Secrets Of The Stars (S, M)
Dying At The House His Was Born In (D, K)
Bedtime Story: Teddy Bear's Picnic (B, S, D)

#110: Salt Thieves: What's With All The Hoopla? (all)
Bad Vaudeville Partners: Who's On First? (K, D)
Meatloaf Dilemma (S, B, M)
A Farmer's Tail (M)
One Stifling, Smothering, Overwhelmingly Needy Step At A Time (S, D)
Nobody Likes Us Guys: Think We'll Go Eat Worms (D, K)
Bad Samurai Vaudeville (K, M)
Reflecting About The Moon (M, B, D)

#111: Running From The Zombies (M, D, S, K)
Gay Lovers Spat: Maybe Women Weren't Such A Bad Idea (M, S, B)
30 Helens Agree: Cole Slaw Deserves Another Chance (X)
AT&Love: Trapped In Fire (all)
Gunfighter: Shot A Man Just To Watch Him Die (D)
Just Like Romeo And Juliet, Except... (B)
30 Helens Agree: Hawaii Was Better Before (X)
Barbershop Storyteller (all)

#112: AT&Love: Kathy Turns Over! (all)
Fran And Gordon: Moods (B, S)
Billy Dreamer And The Boss (M, K)
The Folksinger (D)
Westin And Virgil: Who's Gay In Hollywood (M, S)
Billy Dreamer And Buddies Watch TV (B, D, K)
Skoura, The Gentle Shark (all)

#113: At The Bar: Nothing Sadder Than Babies Eating Alone (M, K, D, S)
AT&Love: Networking 101 (B, M, S, D)
Lopez! (M)
Need A Lift, Chubby? (K, D)
Lopez! #2 (M)
Confrontation At The Donut Shop (K, M, B, S)
Breaking The News About Mike's Death (K)
Lopez! #3 (M)
Mom, I'm Becoming An Indian Woman (D, S, M)
Lopez! #4 (M)

#114: The Editors Hit The Town (S, K)
Bobby's Song: Stop The World, We Broke Up! (B, D, M)/Editors #2 (S, K)
Selling The Farm (M)
Near-Death Experiences (K, D)
Cats! The All Cat Band (all)
My Routine (all)
History Teacher/Spy (D, S, K)
Editors #3: Lose Us! (S, K)

#115: Crazy Love: Who's The Cutest Boy On Death Row? (K, D, M, B)
Fake Blues Guy (M)
I Love All Women! (D, B)
Buddy Cole And Oscar Wilde (S, D)
Trying To Trick A Cop (S, M, K)
Mechanic With Beautiful Blonde Locks (B, K, M, S)
Baby: Couple In Park Try To Snag A Child (M, B, D)

#116: How'd I Get Stuck On This Barrel? (M)
AT&Love: Cathy & Kathy-Is The New Guy Gay? (all)
30 Helens Agree: If You Want To Remember Something, Write It Down (X)
Ontario College Of Art: Bitter Artist Lectures (S)
30 Helens Agree: Great Minds Think Alike (X)
The Bass Player (K, B)
Compensation: The Bitch Goddess (M, B, S, K)
30 Helens Can't Agree (X)
Barricaded: The Power Of My Cock! (K, B)

#117: Boo! A Novel By Donald Dane (D, S)
Hockey Game Pick-Up (M, S)
Kevin's Innovation: Middle Of The Sketch Only! (K, B, D, M)
Headcrusher: There's Nobody Home! (M, K, S)
Chat With A Mass Murderer (D)
Worst Vaudeville Act Ever (K, B)
Darcy Pennell Show: Fashions For Ugly Women/Hockey Guy Tag (K, D, S)

#118: Love Meeeeeee! (M, B)
Fran And Barb: Stinky Pink (S, K, M)
Premise Beach: Meathand Candidate (M, S, K, D)
Biggest Crouton I Ever Saw (B)
Olympic Tragedies (M, K, D)
Premise Beach: Gifthead People and Shitty Soup/I'm Not Really A Waiter (all)
Art Gallery Date: Fly On Face (M)

#119: Hey Baby: Howling At The Bar (B, D, M)
Tropical Island Brothers (K, M)
Rock And Roll Will Never Die (B, D)
Nina's Date With An Artist And His Spiders (M, S)
The Wives Are Gone, We Have The Whole Country To Ourselves (K, D)
I Want My Foreskin Back! (S)
My $300 Car (B)
AT&Love: Monique The Pyromaniac (D, S, M)

#120: Song: What Is The Fat Man Doing Across The Road? (M, K)
Couple Met At Food Eating Contest (all)
30 Helens Agree: There's A Time And A Place To Show Photos Of Your Children (X)
Bank Teller Rebel! (B)
Nobody Likes Us Guys On A Date (K, D)
Buddy Cole: Actor, Singer, Dancer, Model, Canadian! (S)
Buddy Holly (K, M, P)
30 Helens Agree: A Helen Is A Helen (X)
The Dr. Seuss Bible (all)

#121: "Best Of..." Cutest Boy On Death Row (#115)
Nobody Likes Us Guys Try For A Loan (#108)
Buddy Cole: They Say (#102)
Headcrusher: What Are You Doing? (#101) Citizen Kane (#103)
My #300 Car (#119)
Poker Game (#102)
Headcrusher: Little Boy (#101)
Nobody Like Us Guys Fight While Hanging (#108)

Second Season

#201: The Smell Of Spring (S)
Couple Relaxes After Dinner (S, M, D, K)
Truck Exec Wields Power (M)
Delfar-7 (D, S, K)
Song: Best Looking Man In The World (X)
Bad Doctor (D)
Trucking Exec At Home (M, D, B)/Bobby's Guitar Duel With Satan (B, M, D)

#202: P.D.: Playing O Canada On Their Guns (M, B)
French Trappers (M, D, K, S)
Cabbage Head Interrupts Ladies' Lunch (all)
Firing Chris (S, B)
Infected Toe (M)
Chris: Hired/Fired (D, B, M, K)
Sir Simon And Hecubus: Spoiling The End Of The Movie (K, D)
Satan Reviews The Show (M)
Chris: Fired From Line-Up (K, M, B)
Buddy Cole: Sappho's Sluggers (all)

#203: Channel 7: Making Up The News (M)
Sizzler Sisters Lounge Act (all)
AT&Love: Kathy's Pig Nose (all)
No Smoking On The Subway (S, M)
Channel 7: Canada Breaks Into Little Pieces (M)
AT&Love: Food In Mustache (S, B)
Aren't You Going To Answer The Phone/Sizzlers On The Phone (all)
Mark Announces The Touch Bellini Contest (S, M, B, K, D, P)

#204: Nutty Bunnies (S, K, B, M)
Buddy Cole: Outing And Advice To Richard Chamberlain (S)
P.D.: You're Still Mad 'Cause I Shot That Guy, Eh? (M, B)
Darrill: Blind Date/ Make Up (M, S, K, D)
P.D.: Trying Out Cop Poses (B, M)
Yes Dear: Wife Leaves Husband With Parrot (D, M)
P.D.: Can You Give Me A Description Of Me Running Naked Through The Woods? (M, B)
We've Been Waiting For Our Check For An Hour/Nutty Bunny Reprise (all)
P.D.: Polite Chase (all)

#205: Jury Of Ex-Girlfriends (B, K, S)
P.D.: Assessing A House (M, B)
Buddy Cole In Prison (S)
Sizzlers Make A Deposit (K, D, B)
P.D.: It's A Nice Day, Let's Walk (M, B)
Chicken Lady Blind Date (M, D, S)
Punks Try To Sell Kevin Hash (K)
P.D.: Suspect Locked In Car (B, M, S)
Life's Greatest Moments: Clean Sheets And A Good Alibi (K)
The Trusting Judge/Buddy Goes Free (all)

#206: The Heavy Pen by Thomas Piper (D, K)
Animal Liberation Raid (S, B, M)
Hair Stolen In Restaurant (D, S, B, K)
Moving Out: Reluctant Break-Up (M, B)
Buddy Cole Spots A Wood Nymph (S, M)
AT&Love: Businessman Attempts A Joke (S, M, K, D)
Theo, The Hip Teacher (all)

#207:Lady Is A Tramp (D, S)
AT&Love: Businessman Forgets How To Negotiate (M, D, B)
Why Don't People Speak English? (S)
Lady Is A Tramp: 3 Months Later...The Proposal (S, D)
Gavin: Paint Your Chair? (B, M)
Cheating Husband Sings To Wife (K, B)
Lady Is A Tramp: 50 Years Later (D, S, K)

#208: I Don't Know How To Play The Piano! (D, K)
Birth Of A Nation (S, D, M, K)
Fran And Gordon: Fired! (S, B, D)
P.D.: How's A Guy Afford A Duck Like That On A Cop's Salary? (M, B)
Freak Show (all)
P.D.: Cops Meet Tony Baldwin: Surf Cop (M, S)
Money Momentum (M, B)
Surf Cop Tony Baldwin: Thank God I'm Not A Queer (S, M, B)
Tony Baldwin: Dead (S)
Liposuction (all)

#209: P.D.: Dream About The Queen (B, M)
Headcrusher Breaks Hand (M, K, B, S)
P.D.: Never Told Dad I Love Him (M, B)
Daddy Drank (D, K)
P.D.: Shelly Long (B, M)
AT&Love: Knocked Out On The Job (all)
Punks: Shelly Long (B, M)
Gavin: Eating A Fish (B, M)
Parents Disown Kids (D, K)
How Would You Beat Up Your Dad? (all)

#210: Guess Your Weight (D, K)
Straight To The Guilt (M, B)
Scott & Bruce: Hit To Math Teacher (S, B)
Leslie Saves Kid From A Beating (all)
AT&Love: Paranoid Office Guy (K, M)
The Scott Thompson Show (S, D)
Guy Forgets Who He Is (D, B, S)
Scott & Bruce: Offers To Clean (S, B)
AT&Love: Cathy, Kathy and Cheesecake (all)
Kevin Eats While Showering (K)

#211: Joe, Do You Have That Report? (K, M, D)
Sir Simon And Hecubus: Hypnotizing Tony Henderson (K, D, M)
Mr. Heavyfoot Runs A Marathon (D)
Bruce And Jazz (B)
Sir Simon And Hecubus: Calling Tony Henderson (K, D, M)
Announcing The Touch Bellini Contest Winner (M, P)
The Affair (B, S, K, M)
The Kafuffle: Correspondence between Buddy Cole And The Queen (S, M)

#212: P.D.: Bubble Bath (M, B)
Kevin Shows How He Sleeps (K)
Doug, Jean And Hildebrande: Exposing An Affair (D, S, M)
Song: Stand In A New Style (S, D, M)
Vegas Aliens (M, B)
Christ Was A Bad Carpenter (D)
P.D.: Daughter Wants To Be A Cop (B, M)
Urination Support Group (all)

#213: It's A Fact: Beethoven's Fifth Orgasm (X)
Bruce's America (B)
Politician: Picking The Wrong Jam (M, S, K)
It's A Fact: The Queen Doesn't Know Her ABC's (S)
Dave Sees Tits On TV (D)
Gay Actor Backstage (S, B, M)
Scott & Bruce: Hi To Nixon (S, B)
Singer With Speech Impediment ()
It's A Fact: Red Haired Girls Are Evil ()
Guys' Arms In Tank Of Dead Fish (all)
Queen Takes Fact Girl For A Walk (S)

#214: P.D.: Directing Traffic (B. M)
Chicken Lady Phone Sex (M, S)
It's A Fact: My Uncle Tony Can Spit Real Far (X)
Film Noir Children's Writer (K, S, D)
P.D.: Best Part Of Being A Cop (B, M)
Satanic Shoe Salesman (B, S, M)
It's A Fact: Bigfoot Can Speak (X)
Mississippi Gary Gets Heckled (M, D)
It's A Fact: My Neighbors Have Been In Love For 45 Years (M)
Bruce's Suicide Note (all)

#215: Mr. Heavyfoot Kicks A Ball (D)
Scott's Not Gay Anymore! (all)
Melanie And Kevin: My Parents Are Gone (K, M)
You Have Cancer (S, D)
Bruce: Poo Guy (B)
Mr. Heavyfoot Has A Date (D, K)
So You're Beating Up This Guy, Eh? (D, B, M)
The Night Of The Cow (all)
Mr. Heavyfoot On The Moon (D)

#216: One Of These Five Men Has Something To Say (all)
The Cincinnati Kid (all)
Career-Ending Moments In Show Business: Folk Singers (D, K)
30 Second Story: Magnetic Guy (B)
Don't Flirt (B, D)
30 Second Story: Zoo (B)
Career-Ending Moments In Show Business: Thanks, Hitler (D, K)
Trip To The Farm (all)
AT&Love: Cathy's Wild Weekend (S, B, M)

#217: Someone's Going To Get A Punch (M, S, B)
P.D.: Ticketing My Own Car (B, M)
Paul Cherry's Demon (S, K, D)
Headcrusher Vs. Facepincher (M, K)
Shortest Tubes In North York ()
Touch Bellini Contest Winner (M, P)
P.D.: Cemetery (B, M)
The Governor And The Hooker (M, S, K, D)
Fucking Good Ham (all)
Paul Cherry's Demon Can't Sleep (K, D)

#218: Cabbage Head Must Die! (B, S, M)
Chain Letter (D, B, K)
Trucking Executive: Eight Plungers (M)
Cabbage Head Is Shot! (all)
It's A Fact: Bragging Aliens (X)
Price Check (M, D, K)
Westin Esterhazy's Spoon Party (S)
Cabbage Head Reformed (B, S, M)

#219: Impotency Cured (S, M, K)
AT&Love: The Morning They Switched To De-Caf (all)
30 Second Story: Tess And Lars Who Build Cars (B)
I Speak No English (D, S)
Darrill: Big Brother (M, K, S)
30 Second Story: Office Party Of Shame (B)
Two Years Late For A Date/Screw You Taxpayer! (all)
30 Second Story: Stones Concert (B)
The Doors (B, K)

#220: Hey, Jerry's Dead! (all)
Gavin: At The Butchers (B, K, M)
P.D.: Sexism On The Force (M, B)
AT&Love: Who's To Blame For The Rain?!? (D, K, B)
P.D.: Clouds (B, M)
Had Enough, Toaster? (D, S, B)
How The Hell Could I Know... (K, D, S, M)
P.D.: Ex-Partner's Fate (B, M)
Mark's Great Sex (M)
Tube Top Of Justice (B)
Francesca Fiore And Bruno Punce Jones: Subtext In Foreign Film (D, S)

#221: "Best Of" It's A Fact: My Uncle Tony Can Spit Real Far (#214)
Headcrusher Vs. Facepincher (#217)
Song: Best Looking Man In The World (#201)
Daddy Drank (#209)
It's A Fact: The Queen Doesn't Know Her ABC's (#213)
Bad Doctor (#201)
AT&Love: Food In Mustache (#203)
It's A Fact: My Neighbors Have Been In Love For 45 Years (#214)
Buddy Cole: Sappho's Sluggers (#202)

#222: "Best Of" P.D.: Suspect Locked In Car (#205)
Relaxing With Friends After Dinner (#201)
French Trappers (#202)
Gavin: Paint Your Chair (#207)
P.D.: Assessing A House (#205)
Chicken Lady Blind Date (#205)
Sir Simon And Hecubus: Spoiling The End Of A Movie (#202)
P.D.: Never Told Dad I Love Him (#209)
Kevin Eating In Shower (#210)

Third Season

#301: Can Anyone Here Land A Plane? (S, B, K, D)
Danny, Have I Always Had These Breasts? (D, S)
Cabby: I'm Not Prejudiced (K, M)
Chicken Lady At Strip Bar (all)
Cabby: Gun Chase (S, K, M)
P.D.: Why'd You Let Him Call Me Those Names? (M, B, S)
Farmer's Celebrity Encounters (D, K)
My Pen! (all)
P.D.: Murder Film (M)
Danny Husk At Dinner: Let's Discuss My Nipples (K, S)

#302: Fag! (S)
Fran And Gordon: Brian's Sleepwalking (B, S, D)
Puppy Won't Do Tricks (K, D)
Relationship Section At Restaurant: We Broke Up A Couple Of Months Ago (K, D, B)
Darrill: Painting With The Inner Child (M)
Fran And Gordon: Making Love (S, B)
Girl Drink Drunk (D, K)

#303: Construction Workers: Asleep On The Job (S, D)
Bruce: Letter About My Height (B, D)
Whole Lotta Shaking: Your Mother's Cheating On Me (K)
Buford Picklefeather (K, D)
Gimmel-100 Organ Salesmen (B, M, S)
Buford's Letter To Olive: It's Been 20 Days Since The Sketch Began (D, K)
Buddy Cole Presents Tammy! (all)

#304: Golf Shop Small Talk (D, K)
New Men's Fashions: Caught By Spouse (all)
Darrill In Line: Flying Pig (M, B, K, D)
Queen Addresses Canada (S, M)
Another Flying Pig Sighting (S, K, B)
The Oscars (all)
P.D.: Another Flying Pig Sighting (M, B)
Polite Ax Murderer: May I Borrow An Ax? (K, D)
Death Of Flying Pig (M, K, B)

#305: Business Meeting: But First, The Whores! (B, K, D, M)
AT&Love: Tanya's Good-bye (all)
Bruce: Open Letter To The Guy Who Stole His Bike Wheel (B)
Tucker: Mouse Obsession (M, X)
Bruce: Open Letter To The People Who Watched While The Guy Stole His Bike Wheel (B)
Representing Yourself/But First, The Whores! (all)
Would You Buy Us Beer? (S, B)

#306: P.D.: Haven't You People Ever Seen A Dead Body Before/Lost Badge (B, M, S)
Accent Class (K, M)
Hyper Housewife Welcomes Larry's Friends (B)
AT&Love: Don't Blame The Clown (D, S)
Scott: Drag Queen Revolution (S)
P.D.: Examining Photo Of Killer (B, M, S, D)
Phantom Of The Warehouse (all)
P.D.: Return Of Badge/Can I See Your Gun? (B. M)

#307: Do You Want To Live With Your Mommy, Your Daddy, Or... (M, S, D, B)
Sir Simon On A Date (K, D, B)
Bruce's Lookalike (B)
Bad Behavior In The Waiting Room (S, M)
Why Did They Have To Take The Word Gay? (M)
Bruce's Lookalike Takes His Spot In Sketch/Bad Doctor: Your Dad's Dead (D, B, K, M)
AT&Love: Danny Husk Is Kidnapped! (all)

#308: That's Right, Einstein! (D, K)
Big Gut Guys (M, B, K)
Wedding Speech: Virgins (D, B)
The Terrier Song (B, K, P)
Wedding Speech: I'm Still Single! (M, B)
Ascertain (B, D)
Wedding Speech: Flirtation (S, K, B)
Darrill: Horrible Waiter (all)

#309: Elderly Woman Falls/P.D.: Don't Get Involved (S, K, M, B)
Sketch Artist (D, K)
Gavin: The Baby-sitter (all)
Mr. Heavyfoot Puts On His Pants (D, K)
Buddy Cole: Falling In Love In Paris (S)
Hoe-De-Doe Guys: Busking (M, B)
Mr. Heavyfoot Hates The Movie (D)
Hoe-De-Doe Guys: Macaroni And Cheese (all)

#310: It's A Fact: You Can Get Blood From A Stone (X)
Want To See A Dead Body? (S, D, B, K)
Scott's Clone (all)
Gerald And Gerald: Spanking Grandpa (B, M)
Minimum Wage?!? (B)
Battle With Scott's Clone (all)
Haggling Over A Stereo (D, B)
It's A Fact: My Uncle's Been Acting Real Weird Since He Lost His Job (X)
The Ship And The Iceberg (K, D, S)
The Fact Girl Wants More Money (M)
Scott In The Sack With His Clone (S)

#311: Headcrusher: Girls! Girls! Girls! (M, K)
Multiple Weddings (all)
He's Hip, He's Cool, He's 45: Joint With Son (B, D)
Raj And Christine: Trippy Boutique (S, M, K)
He's 45: Vegetarian Chili (B, D, K)
Man Sues Himself For Sexual Harassment (K, K, D)
He's 45: Lovers (B, K)
Stay Down: Marathon Bar Fight (B, M, K, S)

#312: P.D.: Opera (M, B)
Kabobs: Get Back On The Horse (all)
Ed McMahon (B, D, M)
P.D.: Overtime Troubles (M, B, X)
Buddy Cole: Broke Up With Zeke (S)
Mr. Tisane: Gimme Some Tea, You Bastard (K, M)
P.D.: Sleeping On The Hood (M, B)
Tammy And The Queen (all)

#313: History Of Boxing (K, D)
Horny Pizza Parlor (M, K, D)
On The Subject Of Me: Lead Soprano At 10 (D)
Can You Ever Really Love A Small Man? (B, M)
On The Subject Of Me: If I Were Stranded On A Desert Island (D)
Agents Deal With Andy Bell (S, M, B, D)
On The Subject Of Me: Recurring Dream (D)
Wig Shop: No One Can Know My Secret (B)

#314: Poem By The Emperor Of Japan (M)
Gavin: Mom's Funeral (all)
Poem By the Emperor of Japan #2 (M)
Lex And Dean: King Of Empty Promises (K, D, M)
Career Advice From Bruce (B)
Bad Doctor: Symbol Of Hate On Stomach (M, D, K)
Poem By the Emperor of Japan #3 (M)
Scott's In Love (all)

#315: P.D.: Potato (M, B)
Captain Wonderful And The Winged Avenger (K, D, S)
She Called Me First, I Win! (B, S)
P.D.: Worrying (B, M)
Homo Alone (S)
AT&Love: Sabotage At The Cocktail Party (M, K, D)
Post-Sex Panic (B)
Shirling (all)

#316: Celebrities Scott Resembles (S)
Sizzlers: Together Again! (D, K)
It's A Fact: If You Don't Clean Your Ears Properly, You'll Pay For It Later (M)
Mississippi Gary: Heaven (M)
Garbage Collector Fan (B, M, K)
It's A Fact: Vanilla Ice's Career Crashed So Badly That He's Back To Selling Vanilla Ice Cream (X)
In Search Of Pot (S, D, K, M, P)

#317: Flying Pig Flashback (all)
Dog/God Show (D, K, M)
Darcy Pennell Show With Francesca Fiore (D, K, S)
Son Of Flying Pig (M, S, K, B)
Thank You Notes: I'll Be Dead Soon (S, K)
Tanya Crashes Party (all)
Death Of Son Of Flying Pig (K, B, D)
Party Crasher Tag (M, D)

#318: Old Yeller (all)
AT&Love: Porn Star Danny Husk (S, D)
What Should I Say To The Creep? (M, B)
Buddy Cole: Vice (S)
Old Yeller #2 (all)
Armada: Name Change? (M, K, B, S)
Horsey Is Your Daddy/Old Yeller #3 (D, K, S, M)

#319: What? What! WHAT!! (S, B)
Sir Simon: Hecubus Fired For Drinking (K, D, B, S)
Burglary: Gary, Are You Gay Again? (S, B)
Darrill: Date And Mama (M, S, D)
Hecubus: Recovery (K, D)
Forgetful Guy At Diner/Scott's 100th Waiter Role (all)

#320: On The Subject Of Me: My Spleen (D)
Chicken Lady At Bearded Woman's Wedding (M, K, D)
Arrogant Blasè Boss (D, K)
Early Days Of KITH: Regrets/Plans (B, M)
Man With Female Doctor: Mr. Bilbo (K, S)
On The Subject Of Me: Cesarean Birth (D)
Spy Models: Francesca Fiore And Bruno Puntz Jones (S, D, M, K)

#321: "Best Of" Girls! Girls! Girls! (#301)
Multiple Weddings (#311)
Taxi Driver: I'm Not Prejudiced (#301)
Danny, Have I Always Had These Breasts? (#301)
It's A Fact: You Can Get Blood From A Stone (#310)
Aggressive Taxi Driver (#301)
Raj And Christine: Trippy Boutique (#311)
My Pen! (#301)
Fact Girl Wanted More Money (#310)

#322: P.D.: I Thought You Knew Him (#301)
Chicken Lady At Strip Bar (#301)
Elderly Lady Falls/P.D.: Don't Get Involved (#309)
Lex And Dean: King Of Empty Promises (#314)
Queen Addresses Canada (#304)
P.D.: Sleeping On The Hood (#312)
Marathon Bar Fight (#311)

Fourth Season

#401:Channel 7: Tribute To A Dead Cameraman (D, M, S)
The Night I Connected With My Dog (B)
Taxi Birth: Cabbie Delivers A Child (all)
Commercial Bumper
Hookers and Undercover P.D. (D, S, B, M)
Repair-Tucker: Auto Mechanic (M, K)
Rude Awakening: Giant Spider On My Face (D, K)
Hookers: Tourist Photos (S, D)
Hookers: Aliens (S, D)
Work Pig (B, K)
(CBC version: Channel 7, Dog, Cabby, Hookers/P.D., Tucker, Scott: Coping With Pressure Through Hair Styles (S), Giant Spider, Hookers: Tourists, Hookers: Aliens, Work Pig)

#402: Showdown-Parents, Alley Fight: My Parents Are Here (B, D, M)
Age, AT&Love: Cathy, Kathy And The Beautiful New Girl (S, B)
Showdown-Good Looking, Alley Fight: Ugly Guy (B, D, K)
Darill Dream, Darill Daydreams (M, K, D)
Showdown-Creature, Alley Fight: Creature (B, D)
Buddy Cole: Virtual Sex (S)
Deer By The Water, Traveling Guys See A Bear (M, K)
Escape Artist: Cyril St. John (all)

#403: Fiore Parfums (S)
Hookers: Are You Holding Out On Me? (S, K)
Fantasy, Couples Fantasies (B, K, M)
Plastic Surgeon (D, M, K)
Hookers-Ventolin: Rudy's Asthma (S, D, K)
Big House, Lex & Dean: Prison (K, D, M)****
The Pains: Phil From The Warehouse (S, M, B)
Hookers: John Wayne (S, K)
(CBC version includes Bruce: Dancing To Drum Machine (B) after Rudy's Asthma)

#404:The Pardoning: Governor's Wrong Number (D, S)
No Contest, Goose Sweat/Spot Bellini Contest (S, M, D, K, B, P)
Showdown-Fish, Alley Fight: Tattoo/Fish (B, D)
Evil Patients, Sir Simon: Multiple Personalities Of Hecubus (K, D)
Showdown-Homework, Alley Fight: Do Your Research (B, D)
Let's Finish Painting, Then Make Love (B, M)
Sandwich People (B)
Mr. Wrong-Rewrite *****
AT&Love: Always/Never Put Salt In Your Eyes (K, S)
Mrs. Ondaatje, Bower And Kyle: Hot For Your Mother (S, K, D, P)

#405: Newscasters-God, Channel 7: I'm Not God (D, M, S)
The Fun Never Stops: Surgical Practical Joker (M, S, D, B)
Perks: Scott's Personal Ad (S)
Neckbone: Mom's Out Of Body Experience (all)
Super 8
So Says You (D, K)
Sex Girl Patrol (all)

#406: Deer By The Water, Traveling Guys: Song (K, M)
AT&Love: Kathy-Big Bats (B)
Apt. Games 1, Hoe-De-Doe Guys: Sports (B, M)
Knife Sharpener: Ax Murderer Gets Ax Sharpened (D)
Food, Fran And Gordon: Condiments (S, B, D)
Apt. Games 2, Hoe-De-Doe Guys: More Sports (B, M)
Forceful Friends: Matchmakers (all)
Maria, The Cleaning Lady (K, B)
Apt. Games 3, Hoe-De-Doe Guys: Explosion (B, M)

#407: The Beatles? (D, K)
Chicken Lady: Homecoming (all)
He's Hip, He's Cool, He's 45: Firing Trondra (B)
Doctor/Patient: Somebody Is Going To Die (D, S)
Things To Do (K, D)
He's 45: Interviewing (B, M)
He's 45: Hiring New Secretary (B)
Judy & Fran, Fran And Gordon: Judy After Chuck's Funeral (S, B, D)

#408: Hookers: Rich Guy (D, S, M)
Gavin Finds Religion (B, D, M, K)
AAA, Danny Husk And Wife: Start It Now (S, K)
Just Terrific, Dull, Dull Since Heart Attack, Until Next (B, M)
Hookers: Puppet (S, D, M)
Coincidence: Kevin Hamilton McDonald: Similarities Between The McDonalds And The Airport Series (K, S)
Listening In: My God, They Can Read My Thoughts! (K, S, D)
Hookers: New Coke (D, S, K)
Thanksgiving (D, B, K, M)

#409: Chalet 2000 (S, B, D, K, M, P)

#410: Receptionist: Any Messages, Michael? (D, B)
Walk A Mile...Sir Simon: Employer/Employee Exchange (D, K)
P.D.: Trick Question (B, M)
Soulfulness, Psychic Delivery Service (M, K, D, S)
P.D.: Thanks For The Coffee, Rookie! (B, M)
Answering Machine (B, K)
Scott: The Importance Of Celebrities (S)
Rookie Puke, P.D.: First Dead Body, Rookie? (M, B)
Divorce Court: Mr. Tisane And Francesca Fiore (all)

#411: Alan Bouvier 1: Best Friend (B, K)
Career Crisis: Anal-Probing Aliens (D, K, M)
Nice Day For Work: I'm A Good Worker Now (B, D, M)
Hookers: Plastic Surgery (S, D)
Armada: Understudy (K, B, M)
Hookers: Commitment (S, D)
Lost And Found: Do Re Mi (all)
Clothesline, Dear Guy I Clotheslined As You Went By On Your Bike (D)
Hookers: It's Just Too Easy (S, D, B)
Comfortable High: Smoking Dennis' Pot (D, K, M, S)

#412: Lick A Lobster For Luck (D, K, M)
Fine Line Between Loser And Potential Stalker (B)
Agents: Tuck It In (M, S, B)
Losing My Religion: Ted's Church Of The Very Bright Light (K, D, M)
Fine Line Between Confidence And God Complex (S)
Gender Bender: Can't Tell The Difference Between The Men And The Women (M, S)
We're All Corrupt, Just Like Serpico (K, M)
AT&Love: Wildman Danny Husk (all)
(CBC version follows Ted's Church with Serpico, then Bruce: The Hangover (B), and Wildman. Can't Tell The Difference is not included)

#413: P.D.: Sound My Refrigerator Makes (M, B)
Third Time Lucky: Threatening The Pizza Guy (M, B, K)
P.D.: Spring, Holding Hands (B, M)
Exposed, AT&Love: Don't They Know I'm A Fraud (D, M, K)
Hookers: Rudy's Birthday (S, D, K)
Mark Endorses Nudity (M)
P.D.: Photo Of Trip To Europe (B, M)
Business World, Tarzan: The CBS Sketch (K, D, B)
Katnapped: Detective Peter Prince (K, S, M, D)

#414: Cannibal (D, K, S)
Children: Santa Claus (all)
Bellini Meets Spot Bellini Contest Winner (B, P)
Wrong Number? No, You're Lying! Put Frank On! (D, K)
Tammy: I'm Not Gonna Spread For No Roses (B, M)
Borrowed Art (K, B)
(CBC version has Can't Tell The Difference after Tammy)

#415: Hard To Make Friends When You're The New Guy (D, B)
Dad & Son Phone Call: I Love You (all)
P.D.: Hockey Puck (B, M)
Clear The Air: First Date With Junkie (K, M)
Seat 12B: AWOL Airplane Pilot (B, S, D)
P.D.: Growing My Hair (B, M)
Rollerblades (D, M, K)
Love And Sausages (B, S, K, M)

#416: Guilt, Courtroom Confession: Shut Up, Judge? (D, K, M)
AT&Love: Monday Meeting, Job Sharing (S, B, D, K)
Bruce: The Voices! (B, D)
Steps: Spat Over Who's Hot (K, D, S)
Becoming A Man: Chad's 13th Birthday (K, B)
Steps: Drag, Shona Helps Plan For The Warehouse Party (D, K, S, B)
The Collector: Purchasing Art (B, M)
Steps: Issues (D, S, K)

#417: Graduation Ceremony: Pop's Is Retiring (D, M)
Poker Face, Confrontation At Bar: Kyle, Are You Married? (B, K)
Francesca Fiore: Did Police Kill Bruno Puntz Jones/I Miss Cheers (S, D)
P.D.: Can An Officer Get Worms From Arresting A Guy? (B, M)
The Nap: Hank, You've Been Asleep For...20 Minutes! (K, D, S)
P.D.: The Hangover (B, M)
Contest, AT&Love: Let The Flirting Begin! (all)
Just One Bite, Chocolate Bar: I Gotta Lose Some Weight (D)

#418: Hookers: Are You A Transvestite? (S, D)
Darrill: Excellent Composer (M, B)
Hookers: Movie Star, Linda Lavin And Catherine Deneuve (S, D)
1/4 Life Crisis: Lawyer Buys A Firetruck (D, K, M)
Buddy Cole: Cemetery (S)
Drunk As A Crow: Who's Drunk And Who's Stupid? (B, K)
Hookers: Cab Recess, Rudy's Side Job As Cabby (S, D, K)
Kevin: Celebrity Advantage (K)

#419: Bike Courier (B)
Ricardo: White Filipino (S, D)
I'm Charging You! (B, M)
Atrium: Suggestions To The Architect (D, M, K)
Drunk Chick From Winnipeg (B)
Art Class: Drawing The Female Nude (D, S, B)
He's Just A Hopeless Romantic (B)
Surrogate: Oral Sex Angel (D, K, S)

#420: Annoyed Cabbie At ATM (S, M)
Seminar: Gezbo, The Video Selling Clown (B, M)
P.D.: Vacation At Home (B, M)
Hookers: Diploma, Teaching Rudy Math (S, D, K, M)
Cabby: When I Use The Word Nigger I'm Not Talking About You Guys (M)
On Board: An Affair In London (D, K)
Scary Sandwich: The Pickle Nightmare (D, K)
Raj And Christine: Extreme Argument/Cabbie (M, S)

#421: "Best Of" Fiore Parfums (#403)
Things To Do (#407)
The Collector: Purchasing Art (#416)
Steps: Spat Over Who's Hot (#416)
The Night I Connected With My Dog (#401)
Escape Artist: Cyril St. John (#402)
Steps: Issues (#416)

#422: "Best Of" Cannibal (#414)
AAA, Danny Husk And Wife: Start It Now (#408)
Hookers: Puppet (#408)
Lost And Found: Do Re Mi (#411)
Career Crisis: Anal-Probing Aliens (#411)
Hookers: Are You A Transvestite? (#418)
Answering Machine (#410)
Chicken Lady: Homecoming (#407)

Fifth Season

#501: Deeply Sorry, AT&Love: Idiot Boy (D, S)
P.D.: Tough Cookie (M, B, S)
Catching Up: Have You Gained Weight? (K, D)
P.D.: Country Club, TV For Suspect (M, B, S)
Feelyat! (K, M, S)
Martyr, Fran: Brian's Been Arrested (S)
P.D.: Peer Pressure, Tricking The Suspect (M, B, S)
The Beard (all)
P.D.: Suspect Confesses...To Being A Bad Son (M, B, S)

#502: P.D.: Recap, Did You Kill That Guy Continued (M, B, S)
Please, Please, Please, Roll My Wife Over! (K, M, D)
Special Sauce (B, K, D)
Chance Meeting: Margaret And Sandy (B)
P.D.: Only Place I Can "Smoke" (M, B, S, D)
Document: Recreating The Moment You Fired Me (K, M, D)
Grizzly (K, D, M)
P.D.: Finale, They Found The Guy That Killed That Guy (M, B, S, D)

#503: Hookers: Microwave, Thanks For The Great Sex (D, S, K)
How To...Male Slave (K, S, D, M)
Just One Guy, The One Guy Who Doesn't Like Ken (K, D, M)
Hookers: Rap (D, S)
Poreef! (B, S, M)
Jughead: Sexual Inadequacy Turns Me On (B, S)
The Hit (D, S, B, M)

#504: God Is Dead (all)
New Boots (B, S, D, K)
Rockey: While You Were Away (D, K)
Hookers: Prices (D, S, K)
Buddy Cole: Montreal (S)
Hookers: Clock (D, S)
Dessert: Dipping Areas (all)

#505: Steps: Gay Pride Day/P.D. (all)
Stump The Waiter (D, B, S, K)
Squealin': Film Buff Or Butt Freak? (M, D)
Gavin: Leaking At The Police Station (B, S, K)
Steps: Preachers, Stoning The Bigot (S, D, K)
Good To Cry: Comforting The Bereaved (B, D, K, M)
Steps: Pride Parade On Rollerblades (S, D, K)
Evan Sells "Sounds"! (B, K, M)

#506: Crusin' For A Brusin'(S, D)
Teen Reporters, Westin And Virgil: High School Days (S, M, B)
Office Promotion: Mad With Power (K, M, D)
Hardened, Cop: Barfing At The Inhumanity (D)
Business Opportunity: Underwear For Sale? (B, M)
Crusin': What's Up Your Craw? (S, K)
Bath Party & Crawl: Leaders For The Future (K, M, B)
Crusin': Using The Wrong Lines? (S, M)
Each Day We Work (B, M)

#507: Slo-Mo (D, M, K)
Ex-Girlfriend Relocation Program (K, M, D)
Hookers: Heart Of Gold (D, S)
Looking For Love: Where Was The Love My Horoscope Promised? (B)
Take A Letter: Hooter Obsession (K, D, S)
Hookers: Want A Date? (D, S)
Duck Blind (S, M)
Big In France (all)

#508: Call Me: 555-SLUT (X)
Chicken Lady: Hobby Horse (M, S, D, B)
Bruce: Old People (B)
Gotcha Ya, Office Obsession: It Wasn't That Funny (K, M, B)
Call Me: 555-SLUT #2 (X)
Step Class: You Stole My Workout Song! (M, B, S)
Call Me: 555-SLUT #3 (X)
Needed Elsewhere: Having Friends To Dinner To Meet Gay Lover (K, S, D, M)

#509: Steps: Coming Out To Parents (D, S, K)
Loud American Shopping: Crab Shampoo (M, K)
Loves Ya: Discussing Commitment (B, D)
The DT's: Mr. Tisane At The Doctor's (K, D, M)
Great Ideas: Boiled Potato Restaurant (M, D, S, K)
Step Guys At The Movies: Intimate Circumstances (D, S, K, B)

#510: Small Town People: Cleanest Town In North America (D, K)
Agents: Last Call (S, M, K)
Lovers #3-700D: Suppose You Were A Chicken And I Was An Oven (M, D)
The Bank: Yakkey Kid (K, B, D, M)
Dave Foley/An Elk (D, S)
The Trick: The Hump (S, B)
Lovers #4-Vagina: If I Got Fat, Ugly And Old (M, D)
My Training: Bathtub Soaking Competition (B, K, M)

#511: Test Tube Baby (D, S)
AT&Love: Kathy At The "Dry Cleaners" (B, M, K, S)
Hookers: Kid, First Timer (D, S, K)
Hoe-De-Doe Guys: Dinner And "Dignity" (B, M, K)
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie: The Communist Trick (D, K)
Hookers: Rudy And His Mom (S, K)
Mercenary: Relationships And Opportunism (all)

#512: Good Connection: Oops, Dialed Again (D, K)
Extreme Romance: Raj And Christine At Home (S, M)
Armada-Check: Commercial Bumper (B, M, K)
Shoe Shine (B, K)
The Monkeys Are Loose (D, M)
Under Dog: You'll Be Back Because I'm Sexy (K)
Armada-Camera Man: Commercial Bumper (B, M, K)
AT&Love: Husk Musk (all)

#513: Poor Richard: Taking To Your Clothes (K)
Stu And Charisse: Bartender Wedding (all)
Hookers: Hopeful, Undercover Video (D, S, M)
Darn Near Puked: Grossest Thing I Ever Saw (S, K, B)
Hookers: Heels And Old "Boyfriend's" (S, D)
Activist: AIDS List (S, M)
Armada-Muted: Commercial Bumper (K, B, M)
Dance: Coping After The Wife's Death (B, S, K, M)

#514: P.D.: "Looting" In L.A. (B, M)
It's Nothing: Your Ear Is Bleeding (K, D, B)
Bikini Inspector (B)
P.D.: Fired Guns In Anger? (B, M)
Yes Minister: Buddy Cole Performs A Wedding (S, K, M)
This Scene Was "Written In Haste" (S, K, D)
Tucker Touches A Car (M)

#515: Uncouth: Cyclops (D, S)
Playback: Security Camera (B, M, D)
Penny: Farmer Kicked By Cow (D, M, K, S)
A Fabio World (B)
All's Fair In Love: Mona, Let's Travel Back In Time To Rekindle Our Love (D, K)
Fran And Ruby: Identity, Scottish Tales (S, M)

#516: Secret Pleasures: AT&Love: Did You Write This Report Naked? (D, S, K)
Errands: Please Don't Cut Off My Cable (M, S)
Gazebo (all)
Scott's Dream: What If KITH Had Been Filmed In L.A. Instead Of Toronto (S)
Darrill: Experiments On His Feet (B, M)

#517: Creative Possibilities: Office/Submarine! (K, D)
Step Guys: Butch's Phone Sex Party (S, D, K)
Weekend With Daddy (B, K)
Living Proof: Dead Rock Band Press Conference (M, K, B)
Big Bucks For Dead Animal Removal (B)

#518: Why, P.D.: The OomPah Killer (B, M, K)
Personal: AT&Love: Brown Stuff (S, D)
Exercise: Perfect Couple (B, K)
Steps: AIDS Cure "Conspiracy" (S, D, K)
AT&Love: Bye Stan (all)
Bellini Day (B, M, D, P)

#519: Francesca Fiore And Bruno Puntz Jones: Syntax (S, D, M)
Sperm Bank Robbery (M, S, B, K)
Unannounced: The Queen Plays Truth Or Dare (S, D, K)
Mystery Sperm: Tucker?
Impulsive: Killing The President (D)
Mystery Sperm: Cops?
Operation: Surgery Channel (all)
Mystery Sperm: Gordie Howe! (X)

#520: Armada: Check, Rehearsing Music And Moves (M, B, K)
Crowd Control (D, K)
Encyclopedia Salesman And The You Lost Me Guy (B, S, D)
Junk Mail Saved My Life (K)
Armada: Nice Face (M, B, K)
Liquidation Sale: Don't Do That, You'll Break It! (all)
Sam & Janet: Sense Of Loss (D, S)
Stairclimber, Climbing The Stairs: A Musical (K, S, M)

#521: Bellini Opening: The End Of The Beginning (P)
Armada: But Are We Gonna Make It? (K, B, M)
A Tribute To Jeff Berman (all)
Buddy Cole: Empty Bar (S)
Things We Couldn't Show: Hitler Blanks A Donkey, The Home Run, Soup Du Jour (D, K, B)
AT&Death/Ovation/Troupe Buried Alive/Bellini Speaks (S, B, M, D, K, P)

#522: "Best Of" with God Is Dead (#504)
Chicken Lady: Hobby Horse (#508)
Penny: After The Cow Kicked The Farmer (#515)
Playback: Security Camera (#515)
Please Please Please Roll My Wife Over! (#502)
How To...Male Slave (#503)

Edited: 8 Sep 2002
Corrections made: 3 Dec 2002